Monday, February 8, 2016
The Sin of Pride, In One of Its Many Disguises
I was feeling very depressed recently, because I am aware that someone whom I love and greatly admire does not like me. Frankly, that is something I am not used to, because most people DO like me, I am happy to say.
So, as usual, I took it to Jesus in prayer, looking for some consolation, but that is definitely not what I got! Instead, He allowed me to see that my need for the approval of others is actually a manifestation of vanity, one of Pride's many insidious variations. Obsessing about this was just distracting me from living for and in Him; the only person whose judgment I need to be concerned about is His, no one else's. Furthermore, I will never achieve the virtue of humility until I can detach myself from caring about what others think of me.
Although this was hardly welcome information, I recognized that if I truly mean what I say--that I aspire to live a life of holiness for love of Jesus--it is something I needed to know, so I thanked Him anyway.
Actually, it feels quite liberating to (at least) stop caring about what that person thinks of me--and I believe I have, because I am much more peaceful at heart now. Let's see if I can keep it up.
I did a little Googling and discovered there is a prayer for this, The Litany of Humility, written by Cardinal Merry del Val. I will be reciting it often, and trying to really mean it as I say it! +